It was just a routine test

I had a routine pap test by my GP. His receptionist phoned me telling me I needed to make an appointment to see him about my results. So I knew that something was abnormal, otherwise I would have received the generic letter stating I was fine and to have another test in 2 years. I had always had regular pap tests done and it had been 2.5 years since my last one. I went in the next day. He told me that I had adenocarcinoma in situ. It wasn’t just an abnormality, I had cervical cancer!

It was regular, approved medicine that picked up my cancer through a standard pap test. I am grateful and pleased about that. If I had not known about my condition until I had symptoms, I would have been in a very different position being treated and who knows what would have happened.

It was a shock, but didn’t sink in straight away. I think I was pretty calm and tried to focus on understanding the details I was hearing. My mind grappled with the terms, including pre cancer and early cancer. My doctor was great at explaining everything. He told me the basics, gave me information and referred me to a gynaecological oncologist. He told me that my specialist would do more testing and advise me if I had pre cancer or early cancer, however these initial results indicated cancer (rather than pre cancer).

About 80% of cervical cancers are squamous (on the skin/surface) and about 20% are glandular. Mine was glandular, which meant it was deeper and more difficult to detect. I was fortunate that it had been picked up by a pap test! I didn’t have any symptoms that I was aware of.

It wasn’t until I was back in my car that I started crying. I sobbed and the emotions flooded through my body. CANCER! F**k! It felt like I was watching myself and that this was happening to someone else not me. That’s serious. This might be early and ok but it could be really bad. People die from cancer, a lot. Shit! Breathe, stay positive. One step at a time. Book the next appointment. Don’t get ahead of yourself.

I had my little 1 1/2 year old boy with me. Seeing me from the car seat behind me he must have thought I was laughing, as he giggled to me. That broke the tension in the air around me. I told him I was ok and he distracted me. There were countless more times to come when he would make me laugh and feel comforted, even when he thought I was just comforting him.

Several other people raised that this was not fair and made no sense. Some pointed out that I was fit and healthy and that I had always generally looked after myself. So why did I have cancer when people who abused their own bodies didn’t? I actually didn’t spend time on this. I couldn’t change it, so there was no point wasting time and energy wondering “why me?”.

I read the brochures about cervical cancer and learned that the human papilloma virus (HPV) is the main cause. Most people have it. Most of the time it doesn’t cause any problems. The vaccination had become available after I was sexually active, so I’d missed out on that. There was nothing I could do to change the situation, so I had to accept it and move on.

I saw my gynaecological oncologist and liked him immediately. He was direct which I appreciated.  There was no bullshit. I trusted him. He did a colposcopy to take a closer look. He took small biopsies and they confirmed my cancer of the glandular cells in my cervix. So from there I moved onto treatment.